After a fun weekend of chilling and not doing laundry or cleaning, I dragged myself to work Monday morning. So not in the mood. I had not been to the gym in almost two weeks, I hadn't had any caffeine yet, and I had been up late reliving my childhood watching Sixteen Candles. Ross was busy in his office when I came in, so I sat at my desk and reviewed my schedule. Should be a light day, thankfully, because I had to shlep out to the Bronx to attend a fundraiser of a client--I was not in charge of the event but it was for the Huffington Juvenile Diabetes Foundation, and my good friends Steve and Hope were on the board and were going to be there, so I had agreed to represent Moxie at the bash. I was SO not in the mood. I really would not have gone, but I LOVED Steven and Hope.

What was I doing today? I needed to do a lot of data entry. I needed caffeine. I had some flat diet coke in my cabinet, I started with that. It was not good. I glanced at the clock. 11 am. I still had HOURS to go.

Peace Treaty

Joe breezed into the office the following day, leaned over my desk, commented on my latest desktop picture change and grinned at me. I shot him a dirty look, muttered something under my breath (okay, not so under my breath) and he backed off into his office. A few minutes later he passed me to drop something off on Lainie's desk, and he paused. "I'm not sure why you're giving me such attitude," he said. "But I really don't have time to deal with it."
"Fine."
Visibly annoyed, he walked away, then came back. I focused very hard on the article I was reading about American Idol.
"Don't give me attitude because you're annoyed that I sent you-"
"Not right now." I desperately kept my eyes glued to the screen.
"Look, let's go outside for a minute."
"No."
Frustrated, Joe went back to his office. A minute later my phone rang.
"What?"
"I'd like to resolve this."
I sighed. I don't do confrontation. Hence my attitude towards him. That's my passive-aggressive way of telling him I was mad.
"I asked you to do something. It took a really long time and I thought that it was simple and I managed to do it in five seconds. That email was pure professional criticism and has nothing to do with us being friends."
"It was obnoxious." I said. "I always appreciate constructive criticsm, especially from you. but there's a way of saying something, and that email was a clear 'I am superior and clearly more capable'. And that really hurt me. I'm not your secretary. I don't mind taking orders from you for a project but you can't be all degrading about it."
"I apologize."
"Thanks. Me too."
"Great. So we're cool."
"We're cool." I conceded. We hung up.
"So no more Evil Spawn Alex Karev?" Lainie asked.
"Not today." I replied. We laughed and I refocused on American Idol.

Further Death to Joe!

The day dragged on. I made several attempts to locate the Marina Restoration chairs, but of course no one answered their phones or responded to my emails. I finished the mailing. I did the ad. Things were starting to move along, and I was hopeful that I would make it home in time for Will and Grace. And then...an email from Joe:

I spoke with Rick at the Marina Restoration Project in my first attempt to reach themtoday and have arranged for them to meet with me and discuss their ideas and their event designer choices.

Please send me the final version of last month's prospectus. There is no longer a need for you to involve yourself in contacting MRP. Please concentrate your efforts on collecting all the relevant information so we can get moving on this once I have identified a designer.

I shrieked in anger and annoyance, forwarded the email to Lainie and Daniel, took a deep breath...and I was still angry. Lainie looked over at me uncertainly.
"Wow." She said.
"Two words." I shook my head. "Bite me."
"I hear you."
"Am I overreacting here? How much more obnoxious can he be?" I flopped back in my chair. Joe was waaay up on his high horse. All my respect for him had fled, leaving only anger and frustration. I felt like he had betrayed my trust by pretending to be a decent human being and really he was a jerk underneath all along. "I don't need this David Taylor Holier Than thou Better Than Everyone Else Syndrome from anyone else. Thanks, though."
"Let me guess," Ross leaned againt my desk. "Joe's email?"
(Because of course he had cc'd everyone)
"You're rational and calm." I said "Do YOU think this is ridiculously obnoxious?"
"It could have been more obnoxious," Ross pointed out.
I gave him a LOOK. It was late, I was tired, and I had missed walking around in the beautiful seventy degree weather. A slight turn of my head indicated that not only had I missed it, it was now pouring. All in all, a great day.

ARGH! Death to Joe!

I was exhausted. I had a mailing for a huge client and I had slogging through the tedium all day. Ross was mercifully elsewhere, but I was stressed. I had to finish the mailing by 2, do follow up from an event the previous week, and create an ad for a client by 5, and in between that I had deadlines on the Marina Restoration Project. Deadlines that were ridiculous and imposed by Joe, who was getting increasingly superior and irritating with every day that went by. I never should have gone to him for advice. Ever.

I finished the mailing and sent an email to the office, reminding them that I would be leaving "early" tomorrow (if early is 6:00 pm). I immediately got a response from Joe:

Make sure we have an appointment with Marina Restoration Chairs before you leave. I'm not sure why this hasn't happened yet. If you have been emailing
them, then please copy me on ALL emails so that I have some idea of the progress. It should not be taking 3 weeks to make an appointment.

Um, who the hell died and made you my boss? I report to Ross. I reported to the executive director, and to my clients. Not Joe. I was fuming. Um, did I not have any other fecking work to do? I had just finished an event. Mailing. Ad. LIFE.

"What?' Lainie looked up from her desk.
"What?" I responded.
"I can feel the anger radiating off you." Lainie stood up and came over. "What happened?"
I pointed to the email. "Seriously. Do you think I am overreacting?"
Lainie scanned the email. "What a jerk!"
"Douchebag." I added.
"Arrogant prick."
"Evil Spawn."
"Evil Spawn." Lainie agreed.

It was Ross. "My office." He barked. "Now."
I groaned, took a big gulp of cold coffee, and slumped into his office.
"Have a seat." Ross said pleasantly. I sat.
"So."
"Yes, sir."
"It's time for your annual review." He didn't even look up. "You happy here?"
"Um..yeah, I guess."
"Good.We're glad to have you. Get back to work."
"Um..okay." I walked back to my desk. What? I asked myself.
"Hey." Joe leaned on the side of my desk. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing." I mumbled. "Go away."
"Okay...but first can you pull the Marina Restoration Project for me? I need some numbers."
I glared at him. "Get it yourself."
"Yikes! Who switched your coffee to decaf? What is it? You can tell me. Bad date? No date?"
My glare iced up a notch. Joe got the message. "Fine. Come find me later, we'll talk."
"Yippee." I yanked on my headset as my phone rang again.
"Rough day?"
It was Daniel the Douchebag. He didn't know he was a douchebag and he probably didn''t man to be. But he couldn't help it. Because he was my friend. And that was not good enough for me.
"Not particularly." Don't flirt, I instructed myself. Don't laugh.
"Someone switch your coffee to decaf?"
I couldn't help it, I burst out laughing. "Something like that. I'm also still hungover."
"Yeah, you probably have a few more days of that to go," Daniel said. "I have never seen anyone go at a bottle of tequila like that before."
"Please don't remind me."
"Ahem." Lainie was standing over me. "Uh-uh." She wagged her finger at me.
"Oooh, Daniel, I gotta go. Talk to you later." I hung up. "What?"
"I thought you wanted to get over him!" Lainie scolded me. "Stop talking to him!"
I pulled off my headset, marched into Joe's office, and slammed the door. "What is wrong with you freaking people?"
I flopped down in a chair. Joe looked up at me. "Guy issues?"
"Shut up, okay? I just don't get it! Is he that dumb that he does not know how I feel about him? Is he ignoring it? Do you think he might like me?"
"Relax, okay?" Joe leaned back in his chair. "You have to TALK TO HIM."
"No way."
"You're so non-confrontational, it's so annoying!" Joe said. "Like with Ross. Did you want to say anything to him about your raise, your hours? Did you?"
"Don't mix up the issues."
"They're the same issue!" Joe argued. "Speak up for yourself. Talk to this guy and tell him how you feel. And talk to Ross. Because no one is going to do it for you."
Grumbling, I stood up. "Thanks."
"Marina Restoration?"
"Yeah. Five minutes." I went back to my desk, pulled the files for Joe, and then continued to stare into space. I was so FRUSTRATED. I want to feel like I'm important. I want to feel like I matter. And I want a freaking boyfriend.
"Hey, um.." Lainie turned from her terminal and glanced uncertainly at me ."Have you...have you spoken to David lately?"
"Yeah, he came by my apartment, said he wanted to talk later, borrowed some eggs, and left."
"Oh."
"Why?"
"Just curious." Lainie gave me a strange smile. My phone rang again and I tried to muster up some cheer. "Moxie."
"Babe." It was Jax. "Have you heard about David?"
"What?"
"David and Allie got engaged last night."
"I'm sorry, what?"
"David...and Allie."
"I'm sorry, Jax, I thought you said David and Allie."
Jax was silent.
"Evil Spawn didn't even call me!"
"Well, he is the evil spawn."
"He's worse than Alex Karev."
"Look, you should call him."
"No."
I hung up the phone and buried my face in my hands. Could this day get worse?